Often
we get people writing to us talking about the joy of watching
the miracle of birth of puppies. This is particularly disturbing
to us, as try as we might, people refuse to believe that things
can and do go wrong, and that in many cases, having children
watching or involved in a bitch giving birth is not appropriate
to either the child or the dam, and indeed can disturb the
bitch, and cause on-going trauma and nightmares to the child.
So, the best we can do is try to get the message across in
this tongue in cheek account below which talks about the "joy
of birth" video.
Announcing "THE MIRACLE OF BIRTH" Videotape
Intended for all those who want to breed little Fluffy in
order to let their children experience the "miracle of
birth". This real-time video tape set can either substitute
for home breeding or guide you in making the most of your
breeding decision.
Experience
the joys of seeing a live puppy pop effortlessly from its
mother's body and see her consume the bloody afterbirth! (Most
children will squeal with delight when seeing this for the
first time - many will make a life-long commitment to celibacy
then and there.)
Enjoy
watching the frantic efforts of a breeder trying to resuscitate
a still-born puppy.
See
the hilarious actions of a bitch who searches for the puppy
she thinks she just dropped but which was quickly tossed into
the wastebasket because it was only a blackened, half-developed
fetus.
Reserve
a full 36 hours to see the entire set of tapes in one sitting
to really share the drama, boredom, and exhaustion of the
breeder as she labors to help her struggling bitch in extended
labor.
Watch
as a breeder tries to recruit several helpers to carry her
dying bitch to the car for transport to the nearest animal
hospital in a futile attempt at saving the beloved family
pet (Seeing the children crying and asking what is happening
is half the fun!)
Follow
the fun as a breeder and his wife alternate duties during
a full week of 4-hour bottle feedings with a fading puppy
while also trying to keep 13 others dry and healthy!
And,
as an extra added attraction:
Laugh
with us at the madcap antics of a typical shelter worker as
she accepts new animals while keeping a straight face as mom
and dad assure little Kevin that the nice lady will take VERY
GOOD care of 8-year Floppy. Enjoy the thrills as she later
shoves unwanted puppies and adult dogs into a gas chamber
as she chokes back tears and goes home to try and explain
to her children just what she does at work!
And,
for a limited time only, we will include free of charge the
video tape of a recent arrest made by the local animal control
officer who discovered that someone had falsely declared his
male dogs neutered (to save on license fees) and then discovered
he was planning to do the job himself at home!
Yes,
if you, or a friend, are considering breeding Fluffy to show
children the "miracle" of birth, be sure to get
this video and show them the miracle of death at the same
time!
Special
to the first five purchasers, one frozen still-born puppy
- just wait until you take it home and see how the kids' eyes
light up as the pup thaws!!
Reproduction
and distribution of this advertisement in its entirety strongly
encouraged. Phone,
e-mail, or postal orders NOT accepted, this tape is sold ONLY
in person because I REALLY want to meet you.
Author unknown
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